Search Results: Michele Bender

If you’re a curly girl, one crucial part of your hair arsenal has to be hair gel. Why? “Because gel can help you stay frizz free and define and hold your curls’ natural shape,” says Lorraine Massey, author of “Curly Girl: The Handbook.”

That said, not any old gel will do and neither will any old application process. As a newly natural girl, here are a few tips that you should take with you as you peruse the drugstore aisles and apply gel in your bathroom.

• Curly hair is naturally drier than other hair types, which is one reason why it needs moisture to stay frizz free and healthy. Since alcohol tends to leave hair parched and crispy like ramen noodles, look for an alcohol-free hair gel. Also, avoid silicone, an ingredient that can prevent hair from soaking up much-needed moisture by repelling it.
• Apply gel to hair that is freshly cleansed and wet while standing bent over at the waist with your head tilted forward. Squirt some gel in the palms of your hands and evenly deposit it throughout your hair. Then, gently scrunch sections of hair upward. Lift your head upright, shake hair gently into place and lightly graze a little extra gel downward over the top canopy layer of hair.
• Do not disturb your hair again until it dries. This is key! During the drying process the gel may harden and crystalize, but don’t worry. “This is a good thing,” explains Massey. “It’s called a ‘gel cast’ and helps hold the natural curl formation until hair dries, protecting it from outside elements like wind and humidity.
• When hair is completely dry, simply break this gel cast by lightly scrunching hair upward and shuffling hair at the scalp. This movement and the warmth of your hands will help dissolve it. In addition, using a light leave-in or oils to help break up the curls will help to create softer tresses and eliminate the crunchy look.

Happy styling, curlies, and welcome to #teamnatural!

Curly and wavy girls often wonder why their strands aren’t as shiny as their straight-haired friends. In general, it’s because curly and wavy hair is drier and because many curly and wavy girls do things that disrupt their natural hair and leave it dull. So how do you keep frizz at bay but also get great curly hair shine? It’s easy. Read on!

Don’t ruffle your hair

Each strand of hair has tiny scales covering it like overlapping tiles on a roof. “When the tiles lie flat, they reflect light and your hair shines,” explains Lorraine Massey, co-owner of Devachan Salons and Spa and author of Curly Girl: The Handbook. “When they’re ruffled, your hair won’t shine because light needs to be reflected off a smooth surface.” Things that rough up the cuticle include heat from blow dryers and flat irons, chemical treatments, terry cloth towels and hair brushes. Skip the heat and chemical products (if you must use a hair dryer, use a hair diffuser“>, toss the hair brush and combs and use a micro-fiber towel or old t-shirt to dry your hair.

Skip detergent shampoos

“Traditional shampoos contain detergents that erase shine from hair,” says Massey. “Hair is like fabric and we never look for shine in our clothes after we wash them so why would you expect your hair to shine after?” Instead, look for cleansers that are 100% sulfate-free and contain botanicals or cleanse hair with conditioner rather than shampoo. It actually works just as well because it’s the movement of your fingers on the scalp that cleanses hair. Simply apply conditioner to finger tips and gently massage scalp to release dirt and oils.

Steer clear of silicone

Silicone is another hair shine eraser, but it’s ironically also in a lot of shine products. “At first, silicone seems to give hair shine, but eventually that shine turns into an unhealthy, heavy, dull, greasy look,” says Massey.  Alcohol also gives hair a dull cast because it dries it out – and curly hair is naturally dry enough on its own. Instead, read product labels and look for styling products that are silicone-free and alcohol-free.

1. Type 2 (Wavy”>: Wavy and swavy hair tends to be shinier than tighter curl types. But you should still say sayonara to shampoo to keep this shine and enhance it. You can also give hair extra body and luster by combining a little alcohol-free, silicone-free gel with your sulfate-free shampoo. Use this to cleanse hair and rinse completely. Follow with conditioner.
2. Type 3 (Curly”>: Eat your way to gleaming strands! Foods that contain healthy fats help moisturize hair from the inside out leaving it shinier and thicker. In fact, women who go on crash diets or suffer from anorexia often have dull, lifeless, thinning hair because they lack these nutrients. These fats include omega-3 fatty acids which are easy to find in foods like avocado, salmon, flax seed oil, egg yolks, sardines or in fish oil supplements.
3. Type 4 (Kinky”>: Every strand of hair has a follicle that produces natural oils and it’s these oils that help give your hair shine. But because curly girls have only 100,000 hairs on their head in contrast to other hair types with around 120,000, there aren’t as many hair follicles and thus not as much shine-inducing oil. Also, thanks to curly hair’s twists and turns, it’s harder for that oil to travel to the ends of the hair to moisturize it. And the curlier the hair type, the harder it is for that oil to travel. To make kinky hair glisten, deep condition it regularly and leave a lot of conditioner in your hair every time you shower to add slip for the oils.

Final Thoughts

How do you get and keep your curls shiny? Give us the deets!

Curly hair does seem to have a mind of its own. But all it takes to love your waves, ringlets or kinky curls and make them look gorgeous is a few simple curly hair tips and tricks. None of them take much time or energy, but all of them promise that you’ll fall head over heels with your hair!

Feed your curls

Despite its larger than life presence, curly hair tends to be more fragile than other hair types and it’s definitely drier. Healthy fats like omega-3 help make hair shiny and prevent a dry scalp. To hydrate from within, eat foods that contain these fats like avocados, ground flax seeds, flax seed oil, coconut oil, sardines, salmon, egg yolks and spinach.

Throw in the towel

A terry-cloth towel and your hair should never meet. “That’s because its harsh, bobbly fabric creates friction on curls that ruffle the cuticle of the hair and the result is frizz,” explains Lorraine Massey, co-owner of Devachan Salons and Spa and author of “Curly Girl: The Handbook.” Plus, terry-cloth tends to soak up too much moisture and conditioner from the hair – something your curls need to stay frizz free and healthy. Good alternatives for blotting hair dry include an old, cotton t-shirt, burp cloth or a micro-fiber towel.

Rinse the right way

Conditioner is a curly girl’s best weapon against frizz since it provides the hydration your curls are thirsty for. Leaving some conditioner in the hair is also key — especially if you tend to get a dry, frizzy halo on top of your head. To rinse hair without sending all your conditioner down the drain, do what Massey calls a “trickle rinse.” “After cleansing and then conditioning, stand away from the shower stream and cup your hands together under the water.”says Massey. “Then splash the water backwards over your hair a couple of times. This ensures that the top layer of hair, which tends to be very dry, can have the right amount of conditioner to keep it from being dry and, as a result, frizzing.”

1. Type 2 (Wavy”> Wavy hair can get flat at the crown area – especially if hair is long. Give this area lift with a few metal clips (duckbill clips“>. On wet hair, lift a small section of hair from the crown and hold it perpendicular to your scalp (rather than forward or back”>. Next, open the clip and slide it onto the hair so it’s close to the scalp. Do this on a few others sections of hair that tend to get flat and remove clips carefully (using two hands”> when hair is completely dry. “Clipping the hair while it’s wet releases the hair from it’s own weight during the drying process thus allowing it to dry with more body,” says Massey.
2. Type 3 (Curly”> You’ve probably noticed that the curls hidden at the nape of your neck tend to tangle and knot easily. “This is caused by the natural movement of your head throughout the day,” says Massey. After cleansing hair, apply a dollop of conditioner about the size of a quarter to the hair near the nape of your neck. Then, use your fingers to gently unsnarl knots and tangles. “Just be patient and gentle since the hair here breaks easily,” says Massey. “Remove knots from the hair with the same care you would a tangled necklace.”
3. Type 4 (Kinky”> This hair type is often extremely dense and tends to be dryer and thirstier for moisture. It will soak up as much conditioner as you will feed it, so be generous! A few nights a week, slather your dry hair with a deep conditioner starting at the ends and working it through your whole head. Then cover your pillow case with a towel and hit the sack. Talk about sleeping beauty! In the morning, you can rinse the conditioner out, though your hair may drink it up and you won’t need to. Decide then if you need a trickle rinse or not.

Final Thoughts

Always, always always sleep on a satin pillowcase, curlies! This applies for all hair types. Cotton pillow cases pull at curls and can disturb the curl pattern creating frizz. Satin doesn’t pull at curls, nor suck the moisture out of them, so your next-day hair is bound to be an awesome second day style!

Last November I had my straight ends cut off and was a curly girl from scalp to shoulders. But to me, the real test of how much I loved my new hair was going to come in the summer. In other words, what would my curly hair be like in the humidity?

Sure, I liked my hair in the winter when the dry air made my curls bouncier, and in the spring when my curls got a little tighter as they blew in the April breeze. But summer has always been the worst season for my strands. In fact, this is one reason I loved my chemically straightened hair. It looked the same year round. In retrospect, however, and after perusing lots of old, straight-haired photos, I realize this wasn’t such a good look for me.

So I started this summer wondering if I’d really love my curly hair when the humidity got a hold of them. Would I have to make curly product concoctions in the bathroom to hold my hair down and keep it from growing that halo of frizz that taunted me in my former curly days?  Or would I spend the summer hiding my hair under a collection of hats and have a wrist full of ponytail holders?

With the last days of summer are behind me, I can honestly say that summer and curly hair do go together! Now that I know that frizz is just my hair screaming for moisture, I gave it what it wanted in these warmer months: more conditioner. I deep conditioned more often, about three times a week, and used a drop more gel. I also spritzed it with a product called Set it Free.

Not only did I like what the weather did to my curls, I loved it! My curls seemed thicker and shinier. And that halo of frizz? A mere distant memory!

Fall is the ideal season for curly hair with its crisp air and light breezes. Once November comes, I’ll be able to say that I’ve gone through all four seasons as a curly girl and, though my hair changes with each one, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

So to slightly tweak the famous James Taylor song: winter, spring, summer or fall, all you have to do is curl! Curl is all you need!

And moisture, of course!

Final Thoughts

How did your curls fare this past summer and what curly girl regimen did you use?

Happy New Year! I’m not only excited that it’s a new year full of endless possibilities, but this month means that “Curly Girl: The Handbook” is now available in stores and at CurlMart. And Lorraine Massey and I are so excited that the latest curly info is now out there for all the curly world to see. So in honor of the book’s release, I thought I’d write a little bit about what it was like to work so closely with this curly guru.

First, I can honestly say I’ve never met anyone like Lorraine. She is not about selling products; she is truly about changing the world one curl at a time. I admit that this didn’t make sense to me when I first signed on to work with her on her book. At the time, I was a chemically straight-haired writer starting my next assignment. I approached it the same way I did an article on heart disease or a book by a celebrity on anti-aging: it was a topic of interest, but it wasn’t a book about me. So at first I thought Lorraine’s message of curl love was a tad gimmicky. Little did I know that it would truly change my hair along with my life.

When we first started the book, my strands were as chemically flattened as they could be. Amazingly, Lorraine never ONCE said a thing about my hair knowing that I would get to that curly place only when I was ready. The day I told her I was going back to curly, I expected her to say, “I told you so” but she didn’t. And that’s because her goal isn’t to “tell you so.” It’s not to convince you. She believes that women have to learn to accept themselves and it’s not a message she’s going to force down anyone’s throat. That’s when I realized that Lorraine’s goal is to help women live better lives and accepting their hair’s natural texture — be it curly, wavy, kinky or straight — is just the beginning.

Though curls are her business, her passion goes way beyond a day job. This is her life. She may be quirky, peppering all her emails with words of curl love, but she is genuine, passionate and truly cares about making a difference. What more can you ask for in anyone? Working with Lorraine was a gift. I learned so much about myself and about embracing, not fighting, what nature has given me. I realized that curly hair is a metaphor for life and if you just accept what you’ve been given and learn to handle its challenges, every day will be so much more rewarding.

I just got the haircut I’ve been waiting for. The one I couldn’t imagine eighteen months ago when I consciously decided to go curly. The one where the last of my straight hair—which were literally dead ends—got snipped away. I was just going to Lorraine for a little trim, neither of us realizing this trim was “it’! But once she started snipping she realized that the straight ends could go. Sure, my hair is a little shorter than I’d like and I loved the length before, but it looks a lot healthier, and most of all, it’s free from the shackles of the straight hair, hair that was just dragging it down. ( I swear the ends—which were a curl with a long straight stem attached—looked like question marks, as if my hair was asking me, “Why? Why did you do this?”> I liked those straight strands because they gave my hair length, but I saw a few recent photos myself and was stunned at how bizarre it looked to have a few inches of straight hair hanging from long strands of curls. And those strands were so chemically straightened, so lifeless, that I couldn’t even curl them with my finger and gel to make them remotely match the rest of my hair.

So it was a choice between going a few inches shorter than I’d like (though as a curly girl we know every inch counts because our curls tend to spring up”> or a weird ‘do. One thing that pushed me over the edge was being approached by a mother at my son’s soccer game who said she’d been watching my curls grow out for the last year. (I didn’t even know who she was, but she was watching my curls?”> But then she said, “And now what a funky hairdo you have! Straight on the bottom and then curled on top.”

At this point, I am not going for a funky hairdo. I just want my good, old curls back. So there you have it. Lorraine says it’s still not the shape it will be because how she cut it was dictated by the straight hair, but she thinks it will be there in January just as “Curly Girl,” the book we co-authored, is released. (The hair gods work in mysterious ways!”> As Lorraine was cutting she said, “You’re going to really see how your hair changes, how much you love your curls and how freeing it was.” And that’s when it hit me that, like most things in life, going curly is a journey, not a destination. Because although I thought I had arrived at that destination with the snipping of those straight strands, I’m actually just starting, today in fact, to live life as a curly girl again. In some ways it feels new and strange to be part of the clan of curly girls; in others it feels like I never left.

I’ve always loved “Sesame Street.” The show taught me my numbers and letters as a child and did the same for my two children just a few years ago. It’s also instilled a lot of important lessons in all of us. And even though my kids are now 5 years old and 8 years old, it can still entertain them enough to give me a few minutes to make a phone call or send a few emails.

And now I love “Sesame Street” even more, thanks to a recently aired segment about loving your hair. It features a little girl puppet singing “I love my hair. There’s nothing else that can compare with my hair. It’s a part of me.” I think about all the curly girls I spoke to for “Curly Girl,” and the horrible hair-related traumas they suffered as kids and think that a segment like this could have saved some of them from a lot of pain. Myself included!

I hated my hair growing up and spent so much time despising it and wondering why it wasn’t golden, long and bouncy like the women and girls I saw on TV. It made me feel like I was different and strange. After all, if I wasn’t why wasn’t there a girl with messy brown curls on “The Brady Bunch,” “Partridge Family” or any other of my favorite shows? Thanks to “Sesame Street,” little girls today don’t have to think that way. To see a curly role model dancing away and loving her wild curls will probably change many little curls the world over—or at least it’s a start. Imagine learning your 123’s, ABC’s and how to love your hair? Now that’s an educational show!

Read more and see the video here.

A segment on “Good Morning America” today really hit a nerve in me. It was a piece on Brazilian hair straightening, questioning whether these treatments are safe or not. A few things got me: the segment showed that even the Brazilian treatments that claim to be formaldehyde-free contained this potentially cancer-causing chemical. Chemists at the Oregon Occupation Heath and Safety Administration and the Oregon Health and Science University’s Center for Research on Occupational and Environmental Toxicology tested samples of straightening products labeled “formaldehyde-free” and found that some had a whopping 8-10 percent of this carcinogen! So even though companies that have more than .1% have to put this on their labels, these companies were NOT doing that. They also found other chemicals in the samples that were not quantified in the lab, including methanol and ethanol. These experts also talked about the fact that even small amounts of formaldehyde can cause difficulty breathing, nose bleeds and eye irritation (something stylists have complained about”>. In fact, even one of the women having her hair straightened in the segment admitted that her eyes were burning.

But I really saw myself when they showed both women after they had their hair done. Despite the fact that there were potential health risks in the chemicals that had just been applied to their hair —one being cancer—and that one woman’s eyes were watering as she got it done, they didn’t care. Their smooth, straight strands were more important than their health! I remember feeling this way when I got my hair straightened. Though the treatment I did wasn’t the Brazilian, I still remember thinking that I didn’t care what it contained. I didn’t care that the chemicals stung my nose and eyes. I didn’t care that the flat iron was burning my scalp (and that I’d have a few scabs on it for days after”>. It got my hair straight and that’s all that mattered. Now I realize how dumb that was. Plus, in my opinion, neither one of the women looked better when their hair was straight! Even their slightly frizzy curls in the “before” photos looked more flattering than the poker-straight hair that looked so obviously NOT natural. (One of them actually looked beautiful and years younger in her “before” photo”>. Their best bet would be to figure out how to make their hair’s natural texture look its best. I’m not saying these women MUST live with frizz or out of control curls—they don’t. But as I learned from Lorraine Massey, co-owner of Devachan Salons and Deva Spa and my co-author for the upcoming book “Curly Girl: The Handbook,” just figuring out how much conditioner and gel your hair needs and letting it dry without touching it (a challenge, I know”> can change how it looks without all the time, money and most of all health risks! (“Good Morning America” anchor Robin Roberts said she asked her hair stylist about it and the stylist said she would NEVER do these treatments because of their potential risks.”>

I’m not putting either of the women in the segment down. I’ve been in their shoes before (or more aptly their chemically straightened hair”> thinking that my flat, straight strands looked better than my natural hair. And because my hair is still growing out from its dead, straight state, I don’t love it every day. I’m still learning to work with it, to make it look its best. But even on my worst hair day, I’d rather know I’m not risking my health for my hair! And here’s something funny: a few segments later they were interviewing actress Sally Field about her TV show. She was talking about the awful, stormy, rainy weather in NYC and how having to run through the rain to the set had ruined the hair she’d recently had blown out. Her hair did not look good, but again, had she embraced her natural texture and made it look her best, she would have had more time to promote her TV show during her few brief moments on air rather than lament her hair! This whole thing reminds me of one of my favorite quotes of Lorraine’s: “Straighten your hair, and you might be happy for a day (unless it rains”>. Learn to love and care for your curls, and you’ll be happy for life!”

It’s official: “Curly Girl: The Handbook” (Workman”>, the updated and much expanded version of the original book written ten years ago, was released into the world on Monday night—or at least the world of beauty and lifestyle editors from national magazines, websites and top morning, daytime and evening TV shows along with bloggers and freelance writers.

The book is out at the end of January so Monday night allowed these editors to take a sneak peek at it, and most importantly, witness curly hair transformations right in front of their eyes. The party took place at one of the Devachan Salons that Lorraine co-owns in New York City’s trendy Soho neighborhood. In front of the salon was a Bentley with the words “Just Deva-ed” written in whipped cream on the trunk, with a trail of empty bottles of DevaCurl No-Poo and One Condition tied to it. Not only was it a fun night, but many curly girls came out of the closet! (Some who didn’t even know they were in the closet and other religious blow dryers who never dreamed they’d go curly.”>

Lorraine knew that we had to show not just tell the more than fifty members of the media how much better you hair looks when you reveal its natural texture and how easy it is to get gorgeous-looking curls and waves. So all party guests had the option of getting a curly makeover. More than half said yes so their hair was washed and styled with DevaCurl products by Lorraine and the salon’s other top stylists. As they waited for their hair to dry, many editors seemed skeptical, but once their hair was dry, they were stunned at the ringlets, curls and waves that had emerged.

It was funny to see how some editors would hesitate to get a curl makeover, with the usual excuses used by curly girls to straighten their hair, “I don’t have nice curls” or “I have frizz, not curls” or “I don’t really have curly hair” and then once their strands got a little of Lorraine’s Curly Girl TLC, they realized how pretty their natural texture was.

Luckily, a photographer for the event took before and after photos because some of the transformations were utterly amazing. One woman looked about fifteen years younger when the dry, frizzy, blown-out hair she came in with turned into soft, elegant waves. (She was stunned and emailed me after the party to say so was her husband!”> Another was shocked that what she called her “bad curls” were actually beautiful because they were given the right hydration and care. There were many stories like that- and many happy late night emails. The other thing I found exciting was that, after seeing the gorgeous ringlets around them, some of the naturally straight editors were so green with envy that they had their hair curled using gel and clips!

In addition to the curl makeovers and a heartfelt speech from Lorraine, there was yummy food (with curly cucumber and carrot garnishes”>, curl-tinis (a sangria type drink created by Lorraine”>, a guess-the-number-of-curls-in-the-jar activity and raffle. The night ended with a stream of newly curled and waved girls leaving the party with goody bags filled with DevaCurl products, a galley of the book, Curly Whirly candies and M&M’s that said “Curly Girl: The Handbook.” Curly or straight, a good time was had by all!

“Mom, what’s wrong?” my daughter asked. “You seem upset.” My daughter’s only eight years old, so not only did her concern make me feel proud that she was so sweet and caring, but it made me feel dumb. Dumb because what was upsetting me was my hair! How could I admit this to a little girl whom I’m constantly telling that inner beauty is much more important than outer beauty? But since I’m also trying to teach her to express her feelings—no matter how silly they seem—and to be honest, I had to fess up. “I’m upset with my hair. I just wish it would grow faster so it was all curly,” I told her. This sounded even more ridiculous once I said it aloud, but it’s also true since now the majority of my hair is curly except the most important part—the hair in the front. Those pieces are a combo of curly on top, straight on the bottom. The very front pieces are half and half and the ratio of curly goes up toward the back of my head. It doesn’t sound like much, but it still looks weird. Also, because the chemicals used for Japanese straightening are so strong, it takes a lot of time to manually curl the straight part with a clip and gel to match the rest—a skill I have yet to master.

“So just tell your hair that you’re mad at it,” my daughter said, as if my hair the solution was totally obvious. What I realized was that if anyone had the right to be upset, it was my strands. After all, I spent six years subjecting them to four-hour-long Japanese straightening treatments using harsh chemicals and flat irons that were literally smoking they were so hot. And all this was in an effort to hide my hair because I couldn’t stand what it was doing naturally. This reminded me of a few months earlier when a friend asked if I was sick of waiting for my hair to grow. “Don’t you wish you could take a pill, go to sleep, and wake up with a full head of long curls?” Of course this sounds good in theory—and on days when I can’t stand my hair, but I actually feel like I’ve had to earn my curls in order to appreciate them.

So even though it’s been hard and seemingly endless, the journey off the straight and narrow has made me appreciate every twist and turn of my hair much more. I get excited when I see a new group of curls or waves. And my daughter and I play a game where she goes around my head finding the curliest strand and then finding the piece with the most straight hair and measuring it. (Hey, it beats ten rounds of Operation!”> I also realized that my hair’s transition is symbolic of my life. Though I’ve had lots of great things happen in my life, I’ve always said I’m not one of those people who have had things just come to them. I’ve always had to put in a lot of effort and usually have a hiccup or two along the way. This just makes me work harder so I know in the end it’s a good thing and the curls growing out are no exception. They’ve taken work and patience, like the rest of my life. At first I thought sharing all this curly craziness with my daughter was really bad parenting. But when I realized that this journey with my hair was bigger than, well, hair, I also realized that life teaches us important lessons in the strangest ways. And I guess this is what makes life exciting and unpredictable. But now that I’ve waited more than 18 months, learned some lessons and really appreciate my curls, can someone please invent that magic pill?

The goal of my quest to grow out my chemically straightened hair and go back to my natural roots was simply to have curly hair again. But like most journeys that we embark on in life, this one has reaped unexpected benefits along the way. So thanks to my curly quest, here’s what else has happened:

1. My skin has gotten better. I’m so impatient for my hair to grow, grow, grow that I’m doing whatever I can to help it along. That means eating foods that contain healthy fats like omega-3 fatty acids such as avocados and salmon and more protein. My hair does seem softer and shiner and it is growing. But my hair isn’t the only thing that’s reaped the benefits. It’s also made my skin soft and supple and alleviated my dry skin.

2. I’ve lost a few pounds. This is likely the result of the aforementioned healthy fats and protein I’m eating to get shiny, fast-growing hair. Because healthy fats and protein fill you up and because I feel like every morsel I put in my mouth should help my hair, I’ve slashed my usual sugar consumption and haven’t been eating as many gummy bears, Swedish fish and brownies. Now my clothes are a little looser and my body feels leaner, too.

3. I’m saving the planet. Who knew that turning my home into a “Shampoo Free Zone” who be a plus for the environment? That’s because shampoos that contain harsh detergents like sulfates, among others, get washed down the drain and into our oceans, polluting them with their chemicals. By giving up traditional shampoo and only cleansing with Devacurl No Poo and Devacurl One Condition, I’m helping reduce pollution, one shower at a time. And since I don’t rinse out my conditioner, I’m using less water than I used to. Lastly, by tossing my flat iron and blow dryer I’m saving electricity, too.

4. My kids’ hair looks gorgeous. Sure, most kids naturally have shiny, bouncy hair and my two kids, ages 8 and 5, are no exception. So far neither of my kids has curly hair (though my daughter is dying for even a hint of a wave”>, but I still use only DevaCurl No-Poo and DevaCurl One Condition on them because I realized that curls or no curls, why rub their heads in chemicals when I don’t have to? As a result, their hair looks even better, feels softer and isn’t as tangled as usual. This is key in the summer when they’re swimming in the pool and immersing their heads in chlorine twice a day!

5. I’ve saved tons of time. Committing to go curly meant I also committed to no more salon blowouts or hair straightening treatments. The time I’ve saved goes beyond the actual time for the hair straightening appointments (about four to five hours at a time”> or blow out appointments (about an hour”>. I also got back the time I used to spend stressing out about the weather or planning my days in advance based on my hair. When you let your hair go natural, you can do what you want, when you want. Want to go spinning tonight? I can! In the old days I’d skip a workout because I just got a blow out. Or I’d have to go because I had an appointment for the next day and needed to get one big sweaty workout in before the next few days of making my blow out last. Just explaining this in writing is exhausting, so reading it must be too. Imagine living it!

6. I was told I look younger. A lot younger! Yes, someone who works in my mother’s office said, “You look like you’re twenty five.” (I know he’s on the payroll but I think he’s an honest guy.”> That in itself is worth the long road to going curly! Just think of all the Botox and plastic surgery women might not need if they just embraced their curls!

I realized recently that it’s official. I have swallowed the curly Kool-aid and am really a curly girl. This shouldn’t sound like a major revelation for someone who has been growing her hair out for 18 months, but it is. The truth is, even when I decided to actually go curly (which was six months after my last straightening”> I wasn’t committed heart and soul. I ‘d joke that after all this waiting and work, I’d probably go back to straight and kept my flat iron and blow dryer in their usual drawer for months. (The latter is relevant because the flat iron and dryer were taking up a prime piece of bathroom drawer real estate.”> But recently I realized I am truly a curly girl. And this goes beyond the fact that I cringe at the mere mention of shampoo (I can’t even walk down that aisle at the drugstore”>, never brush my hair (just use my fingers when its slathered with conditioner in the shower”> and check Lorraine Massey’s Curly Girl Facebook page religiously. I find myself using curl lingo— curl love and curl knowledge, but most of all what really got me was that I’ve become one of those people who tries to convert unnaturally straight girls back to their curly roots. This spring at my kids’ little league games, I couldn’t help myself whenever I saw a curl longing to escape a blow out or spotted another mom with a halo of frizz masking what I knew were gorgeous curls. And this didn’t just happen at little league—in fact, I find it happening everywhere. I can’t keep my curly mouth shut. I have to ask these women about their curls and then urge them to give their curls a fighting chance.

I remember one woman I interviewed for Lorraine’s updated version of “Curly Girl” (out in January!”> who told me that she got asked about her gorgeous curls every single day. It happened so often that she printed up a card with the Devachan website and phone number because she was tired of digging through her purse for a pen and paper to write it on. I’m almost there! I just know how freeing it is to not be confined by a blow out. To not care if it rains or have a sweaty workout. I’m not saying my hair looks good all the time—it doesn’t, especially since I’ve still got two textures of hair on my head—but I know there is a light at the end of the curly tunnel. I know that once my curls are all in and I’ve snipped off those straight, dead ends, I will feel more like myself. Already I feel free from blow out appointments, flat irons and blow dryers (yes, I finally tossed the iron and stashed the blow dryer til winter for use with a diffuser”> and shelves full of products promising to tame, flatten and reign in my curls. Throughout this process to become a recovering curly girl, Lorraine has been my curly sponsor and I just know I have to pay it forward by helping others. I’m especially aware of helping under-age curlies who may be hating their hair as much as I did as a kid. So whenever I see a little girl with curls, I make sure to tell her how pretty her hair is. After all, if I can help one little girl avoid the hair agony I experienced as a kid, it’s worth it. And I guess my curl-love has trickled down not only to friends and strangers, but to my eight-year-old daughter. One day, when I was on the phone with Lorraine working on the book, my daughter wrote me a note on the dry erase board she was using for her homework that was filled with curly lingo. Who cares that she didn’t finish her math problems that night—I had a little curly convert to help spread the word!

A stack of ponytail holders has been my hair’s best friend for about nine months now. But recently I decided to let my hair down—literally. Right now the status of my strands is this: in the back most of my hair is curly/wavy except for about three inches on the end. This would make my hair look nearly normal (using that term loosely”> except for the front pieces, which are half curly and half straight. According to Lorraine Massey, this part of the hair is like the windshield on a car, taking most of the abuse from the environment and as a result is slower to grow.

All this has been par for the growing-out-my-hair course and hasn’t bothered me until recently when I had to have my photo taken for the updated version of “Curly Girl” (which, FYI, is coming out in January 2011″>. For the chapter on growing out your chemically straightened hair, they wanted a photo of my hair in its schizo state. Yikes! I barely let my family see my strands like this so I certainly didn’t feel comfortable displaying it for a photo shoot. All I kept thinking about was a comment a family member made when she saw my hair in its half-curly, half-straight state: “It looks Medieval.” Medieval? I don’t even know that that means but it can’t be good. I quickly shoved my hair in a ponytail and didn’t look at it myself for a good month. But the day of the photo shoot I was exposing it for over a dozen people. They were all telling me they liked my hair and or that it didn’t look “so bad,” but I knew they were just trying to be nice. When I told Lorraine I was going to a charity event later that day, she whisked me off to her chair spritzed the straight ends of my hair with gel, twisted them around her finger and clipped them. Then I sat under a hooded dryer. Fifteen minutes later, my hair looked all wavy. Gone were those dead-looking ends, and in their place were loose, bouncy curls. My hair looked good but as I got dressed for the event I debated whether I should display my new curls or shove my hair in a ponytail. After all, I was on the committee for this event and would know the majority of the people attending. Many of my close friends would be there—friends who’d known me as straight for the last few years. It was then that I realized that although I’ve committed to going curly, for some reason I can’t identify myself as curly. Going out in public with curly hair would be the final step in this commitment.

I’d already employed the dieter’s tactic of telling everyone I know that I was going curly so that if I fell off the wagon and went straight they’d set me, well, straight (no pun intended”>. In fact, the only time I got a blow out during this process (forgive me curly girls for I have sinned!”>, that’s exactly what happened. But going out with a full head of curls was scary. So I handled this the way you should anything you’re afraid of: I jumped right in and took my curly locks to the event. When the first few people complimented my hair, I didn’t really believe them. They’re just being polite, I thought. But the whole night the compliments kept pouring in. I don’t mean to sound conceited but I was getting raves not just from close friends (who would have told me in no uncertain terms if my hair didn’t look good”> but from friends of friends who didn’t know that I was on this curly quest and even from complete strangers. With each bit of praise, I realized that my decision to take my curls out of the closet that night—and permanently—was the right one.

We try out Jessicurl Awe Inspiraling Spray on a curly gal who complains about her tired-looking curls. Want to buy this curly hair product? Click here! Already tried this product and want to add your review? Click here!

I realized how far along I am on the road to curly-haired recovery — and I made this realization in the strangest place: my exercise class. It’s a body-sculpting class that uses your own body weight and a ballet bar to whip you into shape. It’s extremely popular with NYC women not just because of the amazing results you reap, but because most people don’t sweat enough to ruin their hair. No, the exercise studio doesn’t boast about this on their website, but it’s something I’ve heard countless women rave about.

So, you ask, how do you get a great workout without sweating? Well, first of all the heart-pumping, aerobic intervals are intense but short so they’re over before you start sweating. Second, building lean muscle means you boost your metabolism. Lastly, and most important for good hair, they blast the air conditioning. Any curly- or wavy-haired girl knows that this is a godsend since most of us have had a period in our lives when our workouts revolved around our hair.

Mine was right after graduate school. I’d interviewed for several jobs, but the one I was offered was the one I’d chemically straightened my hair for. I was convinced that my smooth strands were responsible for my success, so I started blowing them straight all the time. This meant I couldn’t work out or swim as often (which is probably why I gained more than a few pounds”>, but as long as my hair was in control (or so I thought”>, I didn’t care.

I discovered the exercise class I take now when I was still chemically straightening my hair. The first few weeks after a straightening I didn’t care about sweating, but I did when my curly roots would grow in and frizz at the top. Still, it wasn’t until today that I saw the insanity of not letting your hair do what it wants to do naturally. The air conditioning was broken at the studio so suddenly this sweat-free, hour-long workout had us all drenched within the first fifteen minutes. Since I’m going curly, I didn’t care. In fact, I liked it, because I was burning off a few more calories, something I needed after last nights’ brownie binge!

But with each droplet of sweat, I watched the blown-straight women around me go into a hair panic. They were doing all the things I used to do to keep my curls from unfurling. One woman put a towel around her neck so that the sweat would get absorbed rather than linger in her locks and cause an underlying layer of frizz. Another did the “unicorn” — putting her hair in a loose ponytail directly on top of her head.

This strange looking style (that I used to reserve for the privacy of my own home”> lifts the hair away from your body so you don’t get as hot and keeps any sweat away from your hair. A third woman dabbed her forehead, hairline and the nape of her neck so often that she missed most of the exercises. A fourth simply walked out of the class at the first sign of perspiration — grumbling that saving her blow-out was more important than toning her butt.

I’m not putting any of these women down, because I’ve done all these things and more to stay straight. But I was happy that I could sweat buckets and not care what my hair was doing (which wasn’t much thanks to lots of conditioning and DevaCurl AnGEL!”> More than that, I realized that I’ve made lots of progress in heading off the straight and narrow. My life no longer revolves around chemically straightened hair, and I’ve got the toned arms and legs to prove it!

“What did you wish for?” I asked my daughter, Lily, after she blew the candles out on her eighth birthday cake.

“More curls,” she replied.

Yes, I was happy that she didn’t wish for the newest American Girl or a science kit that would blow up my bathroom, but I still shook my head. Why? Because my daughter has soft, straight hair—the kind of hair I dreamed about as a child. In fact, when I interviewed almost 100 curly-haired women for “Curly Girl 2,” almost every single one described a childhood envy of hair that is exactly like my daughter’s: thick, shiny and straight with just enough body to make it bounce. The kind of hair that forms a thick rope when you braid it. Truth be told, I still long for her hair and love the rare occasions when she lets me wash it, brush it or braid it. I tell her how beautiful it is all the time—probably too much so perhaps I’m creating some sort of complex—and think that despite what other obstacles life brings her this girl will never know a bad hair day.

I have no idea where she got her locks since my hair is curly and thin and my husband is, well, losing most of his hair. Her birthday isn’t the first time my daughter has claimed she has curls. Just recently she and her best friend were discussing whose hair was curlier. In my opinion, Lily and her friends’ love of curls is a major breakthrough for curly girls the world over. Perhaps it has more to do with Taylor Swift’s ringlets or Miley Cyrus’ waves, but finally curls are getting their due!

Growing up, there certainly weren’t any girls who wanted curls (and definitely none who’d waste a birthday wish on them”>. In fact, it was always the shiny, straight-haired kids who said the meanest things about my strands. My point with all this is two-fold: curls have come a long way. They’re finally something that women want. Second, I think my road to going curly has had a positive impact on my daughter and knowing that keeps me going on those days when my not-totally-curly-but-not-totally-straight hair drives me to drink. At least I’m teaching her to love what nature gave her as I struggle to do the same. I realized this recently when I told her that we could braid her hair while it was wet and have her sleep like that so it would be curly the next morning. “I want real curls mom. Natural curls,” she said rolling her eyes. “Oh. Okay,” I said sheepishly. How dumb of me! I admit that at times I just appease Lily and let her think she has curls. It’s the like the Emperor’s new clothes where she says, “I think my hair is getting curlier in the back” and I nod in agreement as I try to find even one strand that’s bending just slightly. I’m not trying to lie to her. I’m just trying to support the loving curls movement. After all, if we start when girls are young, who knows what can happen?

As PhytoSpecific celebrates its 12th birthday, the French luxury brand for curls is hardly slowing down.

In November, the company launched Ultra Repair Night Treatment, a breakthrough new formula that repairs damaged and brittle hair for 48 hours. And in March, the company unveiled Hydra-Repairing Spray for Dry Ends, a special formula targeted to hydrate, repair and protect hair and dry unruly ends. Like all of the other 18 products in the PhytoSpecific line, the goal is to improve the health of naturally curly, coarse and relaxed hair.

“The important thing about PhytoSpecific is it’s all about treatment,” says PhytoSpecific brand manager Sasha Unkov. “All the products have high levels of botanicals that really treat the hair, adding back proteins and moisture that are naturally deficient in curly hair.”

PhytoSpecific was created by French hairdresser Patrick Ales, founder and chairman of the Ales Groupe. His company is known for its ‘Phyto’ haircare lines —Phytotherathrie and Phytologie.

Ales felt there was a need for a full prestige line of products for curly, frizzy and wavy hair using botanical extracts and plants. While customers loved his Phyto products, there had been infinite requests from customers asking for specialty products for this hair texture.

He enlisted the help of Dr. Fatou Batchily-Plat. Plat, who has been recognized for her extensive studies of plants and has studied internationally. For Plat, a curlyhead, it had long been her own dream to use her knowledge of phytochemistry to develop a line for naturally curly, frizzy and relaxed hair based in active botanical ingredients. Ales wanted a luxurious line with beautiful packaging and concentrated formulas.

The PhytoSpecific line was launched in France in 1997 and introduced in the United States in 1998.

Because all curly hair is not alike, the company’s Essential Care line includes three categories. The Optimal category is designed for normal to dry hair and includes the Hydration Shampoo and Hydration Milk. The Intense category, for ultra-dry hair, includes the Intense Nutrition Shampoo and Intense Nutrition Mask. And the Vital Force category, tailored for damaged, brittle hair, includes the Vital Force Shampoo and Cream Bath.

The Treatment Care line, designed for intense care, includes Revitalizing Oil Treatment, Energizing Concentrate, Thinning Hair Treatment, Ca”Energy Dietary Supplement and the new Ultra-Repair Night Treatment and Hyra-Repairing Spray for Split Ends.

In addition to the Essential and Treatment Care lines, PhytoSpecific offers the Styling Care collection: Moisturizing Styling Cream, Nourishing Styling Cream, Integral Hydrating Mist and Extreme Shine Spray.

For those who want to relax their hair, PhytoSpecific offers two Phytorelaxers —one for delicate, fine hair and the other for normal, thick and coarse hair.

For those who prefer a smoother look, PhytoSpecific also offers two Technical Care relaxers: one for fine, delicate hair and one for normal, thick and resistant hair.

The products contain no harsh detergents and are loaded with plant extracts such as shea butter, macadamia oil, kukui oil, wax of mimosa, jojoba oil and mango oil, as well as vitamins and amino acids.

PhytoSpecific has become a favorite of celebrity powerhouses such as Oprah, Alicia Keys and Lenny Kravitz. And it has become a favorite of a growing number of stylists who work with texture.

“Keeping up with the look of the moment requires healthy, manageable hair,” says Julien Farel of Julien Farel Salon in New York. “One of my favorites is the Optimal Hydration Shampoo for a shinier, softer hair.”

“The line provides our stylists with the essential ingredients to repair and revitalize damage and stressed hair as well as maintain beautiful, healthy hair,” says Lisa Cummings of Salon Melage in Penbroke Pines, Fla.