What comes to mind when you think of the hardest job in the world?
Most would probably give jobs that are labor intensive — maybe a rocket scientist, or brain surgeon. I would argue it is being a mom.
Now part of my answer is partially due to me being a mother, but the other part is being surrounded by so many mothers. Whether you have a close or distant relationship with your mom, I hope you can take the time to reflect on past, current, and future times that you have had with her. I am fortunate in that I have an amazing relationship with my mother. I am also extremely blessed to be the mother of 8 very beautiful, unique, precocious, loving individuals. This job called Motherhood is more like a lifetime career, and I am even starting to wonder if God gives mothers a different heart.
My journey began before I was even old enough to conceive.
I remember daydreaming about being a mother. “Stacy, I need you to stop daydreaming and copy the sentences off the board,” my 3rd grade teacher would tell me.
I would literally be sitting in class coming up with names for my 10 children. All I wanted to do when I grew up was be a wife, mother, baker, dress designer, and hairstylist (I have to say that achieving 4 out of 5 isn’t bad”>. At the age of 19 I was blessed to give birth to Nadyiah; I was a single mom until I married her dad 1 year later. I was scared and excited all at the same time.
Do I really have what it takes to be a mother? I would ask myself. Well, life has a way of showing you, ‘Ready or not, here we go!’ My ex-husband has a daughter Kelsey that I took in as my own, although her mom is very active and had custody. She is now 21 years old.
Fast forward to today: I have birthed 3 more children and recently married an amazing man who brought 3 more children into my life. I went from being a divorced mother of 4 for 4 years to now a happily married mother of 8. The word that has remained consistent is mother.
I want to encourage the mothers who are single with children, because I had moments of “can I really do this alone?” There were nights that I can remember crying myself to sleep; sure I had hopes of being married again, but who was going to want me? It is not until I changed my perspective on my current situation and realized with or without a husband God has granted me the ability to be an awesome Mother. My prayer shifted from “Lord please, please, please send my husband” to “Lord I will love you no matter what happens. Please grant me the patience and wisdom to raise my children.” I was blessed to be able to draw strength not only from God but also other encouraging mothers in my circle.
About 4 months later I met my husband through, believe it or not, the Tinder app! I honestly just wanted some company at the movies and that was it. And guess what? That company became my husband 6 months later.
My husband said that one of the things that impressed him the most was that I had a deep rooted love for God and my children. Funny story: there were times when he would ask to take me to lunch or dinner — we weren’t even dating at the time — and I would say, “You didn’t ask if my kids were hungry?” He asked that 2 more times until his question changed to, “I just got paid today, do you and the kids need anything?”
Now he was pulling on the mom in me. What single mother doesn’t want a husband that says, “I want your children to be my children. I want your bills to be my bills. I want all of you.”
For every single mom out there…
I want you to know that every mother has a different journey. I am living proof that God will grace you on your journey. Put your children first and do not compromise for anyone. If your journey is marriage so be it. If your journey is to be a single mom so be it. No matter which road is yours to follow, follow it with an open heart and be led with wisdom. Being a mother isn’t the easiest job in the world but it is extremely rewarding.
